(nursing in public by natural urban mama)
So here I am almost ready to call it a night (I’ve been up to my eyeballs in Quickbooks, trust me I am ready to go to bed) and I pop onto Twitter and see this tweet from Jessica (AKA @TheLeakyBoob).
And I got mad, MAD, MAD!! Here is the link to the guy’s actual comment on The Leaky Boob’s Facebook Page. For one thing he is an ignorant troll and for another, well, he and all of his kind (no, not men, just ignorant human beings) are a HUGE part of the reason that we have such a stigma attached to breastfeeding in our world and why mamas everywhere feel the need to cover up, pump, hide in a bathroom, feed formula when out of the house, etc, etc, etc,…. when all a baby really needs and wants is right there under Mama’s shirt!!
Today I had an opportunity to be a passive role model for breastfeeding.
I was sitting in a very busy Cafe O’Play, our local (and might I say fabulous) cafe and indoor play place, with my two and half year old daughter. We were surrounded by a bunch of NEW mamas waiting to get pictures taken and hand and feet castings done by another fabulous friend of mine, the lovely Kara from Wee Piggies and Paws.
Two mamas and their little babes (and grandma) sat down at the table beside me and one of the babies started to fuss. The mama started to look around in a panic and was wondering out loud where she should go to feed her little girl. I am not shy and I told her to just have a seat in the armchair beside me and have at ‘er! I could tell she was nervous and so she went off to change the baby first. When she got back she tried to get settled into the chair with her nursing cover on and was struggling to get her little one on the boob. I reached over and helped her hold her cover open so she could see what she was doing (seriously mamas, those damn things are more of a hindrance than anything, IMO). Baby finally got latched on and you could see the physical release of tension that happened to mama almost immediately. She told me that she was worried that baby would come off and start coughing though because her let-down is so quick. I gave her a few quick tips about keeping her little girl in more of an upright position and to try laid-back nursing to see if that would help. She was also complaining about her nursing bra and I gave her a few suggestions for nursing wear that might make NIP a bit easier (nursing tanks and T-shirts).
And then….
With the best timing ever, my lovely little extended and expert breastfeeder looked over at me and said, “Mama, can I nurse please?”
And I pulled my shirt aside, exposed myself to no one but my daughter and nursed my 2.5 year old while also having a conversation with Grandma at the next table, typing and sending an email on my laptop and sipping my very yummy latte!!
I felt good at that moment. I felt like I might have made a teeny bit of a difference for that mommy. Maybe she will figure out an easier way to nurse her baby, maybe she will remember how easy and carefree both myself and my daughter where about nursing in public and maybe by example, I just gave a mama the power and knowledge she needed to know that it may be a bit difficult right now, but it will get so much easier.
And that she should never, ever, be made to feel that panic-y feeling whenever and wherever her baby needs to EAT!!
No matter what all the nasty trolls of the world say, breastfeeding is here to stay and I will do my part to make it easier and more normal for all mamas whenever and wherever I can!!
So go suck on THAT!!!
….and goodnight,
Natasha~
Such a wonderful story. Thanks so much for sharing and good for you! I’m sure you made a world of difference to that mom. As women and moms, we need to support one another.
Thanks Fleur, it felt good and I sure hope it helps her and any other mamas around who see me NIP everyday!!
You did her a great service. I felt the same way that mom did. My anxiety around NIP was huge and I don’t even really know why. Fear of exposing myself I guess. I wish I’d had someone help me the way you did.
I had lots of anxiety as well at first and it was not until I attended a La Leche League meeting and met my leader and some other amazing mamas and saw how “easy” it could be that I let go of my fears and just did it! I think LLL meetings should almost be mandatory prenatally!!
Oh, I admit that I was very nervous about nursing in public for a little while. It wasn’t so much about exposing myself or that people would be all in my face about it but I just desperating seemed to need my pillow to get us into the right position. However, we soon figured it out and nursed away.
I agree, I suspect that you gave her a great deal more confidence in handling the whole nursing in public thing the next time.
Thanks for posting the link to laid-back nursing. I’m expecting my 2nd in a just a few weeks and am anxious about breastfeeding again. Only because the first few weeks with my first daughter were SO painful. We managed to make it through that tough time together and I nursed for just over a year. But laid-back nursing sounds fantastic! I’ll definitely give it a try.
Hi Angie,
Good luck with baby #2. Definitely try the laid-back nursing and also baby-led latch. Both of these were a big help for me with my second child. ~Natasha
So great to read this!! I bet this mother will look back on this experience and feel so much more confident NIP now. I still worry about NIP and I’m nursing my 3rd baby! I guess my main problem is insecurity! I am huge, sorry no other way to put it!, and I really don’t like looking at them myself, let alone some stranger starring at them!!! It’s not the act of NIP that bothers me, it’s my tata’s exposed
At least now DD2 is over 6 months and they’re not 10 x the size of her head … LOL!!!
[...] Natasha @ Natural Urban Mama-NIP by NUM [...]
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That is such a great story! I am a few months away from my due date and I have a little anxiety about breastfeeding in public, but I am going to do it! I sure hope I sit next to people like you more often than trolls like him.
[...] Natasha @ Natural Urban Mama-NIP by NUM [...]
[...] personally choose to make my stand for nursing in public (NIP) as I feed my babies. On demand. And trust me, with a three-year-old who is still nursing and very [...]